The Memorial for Allen M. Starrett, Jr. -- Letting Go

Chris, Ian, Ruby, and I went to NJ for the weekend for Allen's/Pop Pop's memorial service.  We made the trip in record time, 3hrs 32min from Glen Allen to Haddon Heights.  Chris was so ecstatic with the pace we were making on the trip that he could barely keep the pedal to the metal.  It was a busy weekend but the memorial service and boat trip to deliver his ashes offered peace of mind.  The memorial service was lovely and I was touched by the outpouring of support for Shirley, Chris, Allen, and the rest of the family.  It really is remarkable that the Starretts have not lived in Haddon Heights for many years but they are still so well-loved.  It was a tribute to the man Allen was and the whole Starrett family.  Another special tribute was to have the American Flag at half staff in honor of Allen.  Allen served as a police officer and volunteer firefighter in the town of Haddon Heights. 

The memorial service was great because friends and family got a chance to greet Shirley, Allen, and Chris.   Then we had a prayer, and tributes to Allen by Bob Starrett, his brother, Allen Starrett III, Chris, Tim Daly, his friend/colleague, and Shirley.  There was a lot of laughter and some tears but it was a great time to celebrate Allen.  Chris did a great job with his comments and he looked so handsome in his suit.  Christine and I were trying to keep the rowdy grandchildren in line while they were speaking.  Of course, the kids were being entertained by books about trains, race cars, and airplanes.  Pop Pop would've approved of the books but probably not the behavior.  A few memories stand out:

• 10 Starrett children seated in the board room chairs of the Haddon Heights Borough Hall
• Allen's grandchildren (minus Grayson) forming an impromptu train in front of Allen's ashes
• The changing of the guard at Allen's ashes, so special
• Hearing about Allen's wonderful sense of humor and the funny "one liners"
• Ian picking up Pop Pop's ashes and holding them and Christine and I couldn't get to him fast enough.  We were afraid he would throw them or drop them.  Yikes! 
• Bob, Allen, Chris, Tim, and Shirley's remarks about Allen
• Ruby seeing that Mom Mom was crying and climbing into her lap to cuddle with her.  My sweet little comforter, I am so proud. 

We enjoyed a lovely reception at the firehouse.  Chris's cousins, Carl and Lisa, prepared and served the food and everything was so delicious.  Ruby enjoyed seeing the "firefucks".  She kept asking to see them and I couldn't help but laugh at her pronunciation.  I enjoyed seeing the photos of all 3 generations of Allen M. Starretts photographed on the walls of the firehouse. 

Chris, Ian, Ruby, and I then drove "down the shore" to go to the Wildwood NJ boardwalk.  Chris's cousin and his family joined us and we really enjoyed riding the rides and hanging out on the boardwalk.  We also got to hang out briefly with Chris's uncle and his family.  I really enjoy the boardwalk, it is just so full of life and excitement.  Interestingly, Ian wasn't as excited about riding the rides, except for the train he rode 3 times.  He mainly wanted to play those expensive games.  Ruby was willing to go on whatever we took her on.  We stayed out until midnight or later. 

Sunday morning we got up early and went to the Stone Harbor marina to prepare for the boat ride to Allen's favorite fishing spot in the Stone Harbor Bay.  I loved the boat ride and so did Ian and Ruby.  It all just felt so peaceful.  Shirley put the ashes in the water and we all scattered flowers.  We said our goodbyes to Allen/Pop Pop and watched as the biodegradable urn sunk in the water and the flowers scattered and floated away.  As I heard Chris tell his friend, "We let him go."  And it was good. 

Beach Memories and Photos

OBX Beach Week 2010 has come and gone. My parents, sisters and their families, and our friends, the Hughes' and their children, and 2 dogs enjoyed a lovely, large house in Corolla, NC. There were 10 adults, 8 children, and 2 dogs.

Here is a list of beach memories that I don't want to forget:

1. The 8 hour drive from Richmond to Corolla on Saturday, July 3rd.  It usually takes 4 hours.  It would've been hell if we didn't know we were going on vacation.  It took Amanda & Chris 11 hours from D.C. 
2.  The 4th of July fireworks over the water in Corolla. Beautiful!
3.  Ruby saying "I like the orange ones." (fireworks)
4. Ian covering his ears for fireworks. 
5. Drew and Ian being roommates in big boy beds.
6. Drew's fear of Aunt Emily and tears every time I used a harsh tone w/ him. "Aunt Emily takes my toys." I plan to spoil him from here on out.
7. Molly's puppy brain on the beach. Her body is almost 8 years old but her brain thinks she's 6 months. She would've swam across the Atlantic if we could throw that far. I love seeing her with so much joy. 
8. Ian, Landen, Baylee, and Kate throwing toys into the ocean for Molly to fetch.
9. My mom walking out of the bedroom w/ her purse on her shoulder announcing, "I'm going shopping". It's been years since I saw that.
10. The yummy dinners and tons of fresh fruit.  Mom made fresh blueberry cobbler.  Yum!
11.  Ian's first trip crabbing on the boat w/ Daddy, Erik, Chris C., Kate, and Drew.  He wanted to "catch 1,000 or maybe 7". 
12.  Ian's excitement with his 2 new swim shirts from Meemaw (Mom)
13.  My bike ride w/ Meg, Kate, Cohen, and Ruby to Corolla Village and back. 
14.  Ice cream at Dairy Queen, just the messy Starrett family
15.  Lunch and shopping with my mom and sisters. 
16.  Meg's awesome camera that took great photos. 
17.  A full week of sleeping uninterrupted in our bedroom.  We only had one 2:30am visit from Ian one night and Ruby slept nicely in another room.  Of course, Ian did wake up at about 6 or 6:30am every morning.  Usually G'Daddy would feed him breakfast, thankfully. 
18.  All of the kids in the pool!  Ian was swimming well and Ruby was jumping fearlessly from the side of the pool.  Kate was so cute swimming like a submarine.   Cohen was fearless and enjoyed jumping when no one was really prepared for him.  Drew had fun in the pool but enjoyed playing on the deck of the pool too.   Landen is swimming really well and we didn't have to worry too much about him.  Kate and Landen really enjoyed the hot tub. 
19.  G'Daddy playing in the pool with the kids.   Meemaw swam with Ruby one morning and that was fun too.
20.  Chris cooking seafood for the crew.  He has such love for the ocean! 
21.  The children on the deck watching the light on the lighthouse come on and off like it was a spectator sport. 
22.  No one needed to go to the ER or Urgent Care.  :)
23.  The fabulous weather.
24.  The yummy cocktails.
25.  All of the kids and adults having a great time on the beach.  High tide would create a great shallow pool on the beach and the kids had a blast! 

I feel so blessed to get to vacation with my family and friends.  Life is short and I'm glad we could make it work to go to OBX again this year. 

Here are some of my favorite photos:

"I will protect you."

Ian and Ruby were so precious at bedtime tonight.  I was in Ruby's room trying to get her to bed and she said, "Hug Ian!" and sprinted out of the room.  I went into Ian's room to get her and they were cuddling in his bed.  She was sucking her thumb with her head on his chest.  He said, "Ruby I'll always be your big brother."  He said, "You can have Max for the night, I don't need him."  Ruby was thrilled and said, "Max!"  Max is Ian's favorite stuffed animal, a giraffe.  Max has slept with him every night for at least 2 years.  Ruby then went back to her room and then her crib with Max.  Ian came in to give her a kiss and said, "Don't cry Ruby, I will protect you.  I will protect you from bugs, monsters, and bears.  Don't be scared."  He then went on, "I'm brave and I will protect Ruby from monsters.  I will say 'don't get my little sister' and kick them."  He then demonstrated the kick (kinda like Kirate Kid).  He then said, "I will think about Ruby and dream about her.  I will dream about buying toys at Target (his eyes got big)!"  He went on, and on, and on...

I'm really enjoying watching Ruby and Ian's relationship grow.  I love to see them hold hands and watch Ian's pride in being a big brother.  He loves to teach Ruby and tell me all the things she knows.  It warms my heart because I always wanted an older brother and I think Ruby is going to really enjoy having him for her brother, at least most of the time. 

As it got closer to 9:30pm, he said, "I need someone to help me go to sleep."  I put on NPR on the radio in his room and he was out.  :) 

Funny Ian Quote

Tonight, as I'm getting Ruby in her pajamas, Ian started calling on Ruby's Elmo phone.  He said, "Mom Mom, can you come soon, Mommy is going out?"  I said, "Ooh, I hope I'm going somewhere fun!"  He said, "Chick-fil-a."  I said, "But my tummy still doesn't feel good."  He said, "Mom Mom, Mommy is going to the doctor."

Ha, Ha.  I love this boy, he has a quick wit.  He reminds me of his father.  :)

More Ian Quotes

These are some quotes from Ian when he was supposed to be in bed.  Instead, he kept coming to the landing on the steps to ask more questions.

• "Mommy, when we go to the beach, are we going to take off Molly's leash?"  Yes Ian, Molly loves to jump in the waves.
• "Mommy, my ear hurts (almost crying)."  What's wrong with your ear?  "An ear bug crawled in it and it's going to mess with my brain.  Jillian told me that ear bugs crawl in your ear and mess up your brain."  I think he's talking about an ear wig but they do not mess up your brain. 
• "Mommy, how do you get a baby in your tummy?"  God puts it there.  "How does God put it there?"  Daddy has a sperm and Mommy has an egg.  And that's what makes a baby.  "When you got married the first time, I was in your tummy.  When you get married the second time Ruby was in your tummy."  Well, kind of.  "How did you get born Mommy?"  I came out of Meemaw's tummy.  Aunt Meg came out of Meemaw 4 minutes before me.  We are twins.  "Oh." 

Ugh, I'm exhausted. 

Ruby Do Turned Two!

Yesterday, my baby girl turned 2-years-old!  It seems like she was just born yesterday.  She is such a blessing and I am so grateful for her.  Since she was born in 2008, our family has endured so much like my illness, our parent's illnesses, Daddy's job change, and deaths in the family.  Her beautiful smile and pretty face (and precious girlie clothes) has helped me persevere.  She is smart, cuddly, independent, and fun.   Here's a photo from the day she was born, and a photo from her 2nd birthday (with her bathing suit and Minnie Mouse ears). 

We had a nice day of celebrating.  Unfortunately, I had a little too much fun at the Magnolia Ridge Wine Night so I was a little sick in the morning.  I got an early morning birthday cuddle with Ruby and then Chris took Ian and Ruby to Panera for breakfast.  Thank you!   We then got ready for Mom Mom, Aunt Trudy, Aunt Christine, Kyle, Taylor, and Grayson's visit.  Uncle Allen was working.  When they all arrived, we headed to the pool.  We enjoyed swimming and seeing our friends at the pool.  Then, we went home for a yummy lunch of grilled hot dogs and hamburgers.  Thanks Daddy.  We had Minnie Mouse cupcakes and chocolate ice cream and then Ruby opened her presents.  She got 2 phones (Dora and Elmo) and a tackle box to go w/ her fishing rod.  She also got a new bike helmet, pink Crocs, Play Doh w/ shapes, a pink watch, precious girlie outfits and much much more.  She, and the boys, enjoyed her new toys.  Then Ruby took a good nap.  :)  Grayson stayed for a sleepover so Ian and Grayson had a great time playing together.  Ruby had fun busying around with her new toys.  There was a thunderstorm so we didn't head back to the pool.  Ruby got a quick visit from Meg, Landen, and Kate and a great voice mail message from Amanda, Chris, and Drewbug.   We are looking forward to celebrating with the Folsom crew next weekend.

I was proud of my Minnie Mouse cupcakes.  Here's a photo:

Some good news... our ENT physician, Dr. Dodson, recommended ear tubes for Ruby due to the level of pressure in her ears.  It did not resolve w/ a month of Nasonex.  That's 5 out of 6 grandchildren on the Folsom side w/ tubes.  Can we say, genetics?  And unfortunately, Ian and Ruby have it from the Starrett side too.  Luckily, it's a pretty easy and painless solution.  So, Ruby will get her tubes soon, hopefully.  I am hopeful that maybe if she is more comfortable, we will see her pull her hair less and less.  It already seems to be a little better but I'm trying not to get my hopes up. 

Some other GREAT news...my boss/friend, Kiki, was discharged from the hospital on Friday, one week after her lung transplant.  She's doing great.  She will stay near the hospital for about 2 months to complete rehab and be monitored closely.  What a blessing!  Here's a photo of Kiki holding Ruby 2 years ago.   A lot has changed since then. 

Photos of Erik & Meg's Children

Meg and Erik's children are so precious!  I had to brag. 

Landen (almost 6)

Kate (3.5)

Cohen (2)