The Memorial for Allen M. Starrett, Jr. -- Letting Go

Chris, Ian, Ruby, and I went to NJ for the weekend for Allen's/Pop Pop's memorial service.  We made the trip in record time, 3hrs 32min from Glen Allen to Haddon Heights.  Chris was so ecstatic with the pace we were making on the trip that he could barely keep the pedal to the metal.  It was a busy weekend but the memorial service and boat trip to deliver his ashes offered peace of mind.  The memorial service was lovely and I was touched by the outpouring of support for Shirley, Chris, Allen, and the rest of the family.  It really is remarkable that the Starretts have not lived in Haddon Heights for many years but they are still so well-loved.  It was a tribute to the man Allen was and the whole Starrett family.  Another special tribute was to have the American Flag at half staff in honor of Allen.  Allen served as a police officer and volunteer firefighter in the town of Haddon Heights. 

The memorial service was great because friends and family got a chance to greet Shirley, Allen, and Chris.   Then we had a prayer, and tributes to Allen by Bob Starrett, his brother, Allen Starrett III, Chris, Tim Daly, his friend/colleague, and Shirley.  There was a lot of laughter and some tears but it was a great time to celebrate Allen.  Chris did a great job with his comments and he looked so handsome in his suit.  Christine and I were trying to keep the rowdy grandchildren in line while they were speaking.  Of course, the kids were being entertained by books about trains, race cars, and airplanes.  Pop Pop would've approved of the books but probably not the behavior.  A few memories stand out:

• 10 Starrett children seated in the board room chairs of the Haddon Heights Borough Hall
• Allen's grandchildren (minus Grayson) forming an impromptu train in front of Allen's ashes
• The changing of the guard at Allen's ashes, so special
• Hearing about Allen's wonderful sense of humor and the funny "one liners"
• Ian picking up Pop Pop's ashes and holding them and Christine and I couldn't get to him fast enough.  We were afraid he would throw them or drop them.  Yikes! 
• Bob, Allen, Chris, Tim, and Shirley's remarks about Allen
• Ruby seeing that Mom Mom was crying and climbing into her lap to cuddle with her.  My sweet little comforter, I am so proud. 

We enjoyed a lovely reception at the firehouse.  Chris's cousins, Carl and Lisa, prepared and served the food and everything was so delicious.  Ruby enjoyed seeing the "firefucks".  She kept asking to see them and I couldn't help but laugh at her pronunciation.  I enjoyed seeing the photos of all 3 generations of Allen M. Starretts photographed on the walls of the firehouse. 

Chris, Ian, Ruby, and I then drove "down the shore" to go to the Wildwood NJ boardwalk.  Chris's cousin and his family joined us and we really enjoyed riding the rides and hanging out on the boardwalk.  We also got to hang out briefly with Chris's uncle and his family.  I really enjoy the boardwalk, it is just so full of life and excitement.  Interestingly, Ian wasn't as excited about riding the rides, except for the train he rode 3 times.  He mainly wanted to play those expensive games.  Ruby was willing to go on whatever we took her on.  We stayed out until midnight or later. 

Sunday morning we got up early and went to the Stone Harbor marina to prepare for the boat ride to Allen's favorite fishing spot in the Stone Harbor Bay.  I loved the boat ride and so did Ian and Ruby.  It all just felt so peaceful.  Shirley put the ashes in the water and we all scattered flowers.  We said our goodbyes to Allen/Pop Pop and watched as the biodegradable urn sunk in the water and the flowers scattered and floated away.  As I heard Chris tell his friend, "We let him go."  And it was good. 

Life Goes On

We went to Mom Mom's house on Monday, May 31st.  Chris was meeting with Mom Mom and Allen at the funeral home.  Ian, Ruby, and I went to the house and hung out with Aunt Trudy and Cousin Dan.  It was difficult when we pulled up to the house and Ruby was yelling, "Pop Pop, Pop Pop!"  Aunt Trudy and Dan had arrived from NJ the night before.  Aunt Trudy and Mom Mom are very close so it was a relief that she could be there with Mom Mom at this time.  Mom Mom seemed to be doing pretty well and she enjoyed the distraction of the children.  We played in the yard and rode bikes.  Ian and Ruby ate a lot of strawberries from their patch.  Ian caught a catapillar who he named "Catapilly".  Ian even fished on the dock.  Oh, how Pop Pop would've loved to see Ian fishing off of his dock with Ian's birthday present, a Lightning McQueen fishing rod with tackle box!  We believe he was watching and sent us some fine cool breezes across the water.  Chris and Mom Mom showed Ian how to work the fishing rod and he had quite a few bites but nothing stayed on the hook.  Ruby fell asleep on Mom Mom while we sat on the dock.  It was very sweet.  Chris showed, again, what a great father he is.  Pop Pop taught him well. 

On the evening of Pop Pop's death, Chris, Ian, Ruby, and I were in Ashland watching trains.  My friend, Kathy, who was with us, along with her family, reminded me that we waited and waited for a train to come.  And then, around the time Pop Pop went to heaven, there were 3 Amtrak trains in a row and tons of train whistles in the distance.  I love that!  I believe it was Pop Pop saying goodbye to us and approving of our train-watching.  He put on a good show for the kids! 

On Saturday, before Pop Pop went to the hospital, our neighborhood pool opened and boy were we ALL excited.  I think Ian was the most excited.  He wore his bathing suit and blue goggles for 2 hours before the pool even opened at 11am.  He wore them to Target and the grocery store.  We got a lot of smiles.  Did I mention that Chris had his bathing suit on for 2 hours before the pool opened too?  Hmmm...  We had a great time at the pool opening party with all of our wonderful neighborhood friends.  We missed the Helsleys though, they were out of town for a camping trip. 

Here is a photo I took of Ruby and Molly after church on Sunday.  So cute!  I can't believe that my baby girl will be 2 years old in 10 days!  And my first baby girl, Molly, will be 8 years old in October. 

So, life goes on...

In Memory of Pop Pop

Yesterday, around 6:10pm, Allen M. Starrett, Jr. died at Rappahanock General Hospital in Kilmarnock, VA.  Mom Mom (Shirl) tried to wake him for dinner on Saturday around 5pm and he would not wake up.  He was breathing and had a faint pulse.  She called 911 and he was taken to the hospital.  He never regained consciousness.  Apparently he had an infection and his body had no reserve to fight it.  He had finished chemotherapy on Monday, May 24th. 

Chris went to be with his mother and brother on Saturday evening.  He stayed with Mom Mom overnight and went back to the hospital with her the next morning.  He came home around 4pm yesterday and his brother, Allen, was going to stay with Mom Mom overnight.  Chris was exhausted and emotional when he got home.  He needed to rest but want to see his children so we, along with our friends, the Suydams, took the children to Ashland to watch trains and enjoy the Randolph Macon College campus.  We were watching trains when Pop Pop died.  Allen called Chris on our way back home from Ashland.

I have never known a man that loved trains more than Pop Pop.  Ian now loves trains and Pop Pop really enjoyed that.  He kept a copy of Ian's first Christmas photo on his table next to "his chair" in his living room.  It's a photo of Ian and the train Pop Pop gave him to put around our Christmas tree. 

Pop Pop was a loving husband, father, and grandfather.  He was a police officer, volunteer firefighter, soldier that served in Korea, fisherman, race car fan, and a lover of trains.  He was so proud of Chris and loved Ian and Ruby so much.  He will be missed. 

Easter Sunday

We had a lovely Easter weekend!  The weather could not have been more perfect. 

Chris and I both had Good Friday off so we enjoyed a nice lunch together.  We both did some chores and relaxed but were happy to have a day off w/ no kids around.  It is rare.  Chris picked up the kids early and we had a blast at the playground with our friends.  On Saturday Chris played softball with his coworkers and we went to watch.  There were hotdogs, chips, and Oreos (of course) and we had a good time watching them play.  Ian brought his bat and ball so he did a lot of practicing.  Unfortunately the game started late so we missed the neighborhood Easter egg hunt.  We were disappointed but enjoyed a nice family egg hunt in our backyard when we got home.  That's the beauty of young kids, they really don't know what they're missing.  We had a nice day just the 4 of us.  

Easter Sunday was filled with church early and then home to get lunch together to enjoy with Mom Mom and Pop Pop.  Father Ed cracked me up with his sarcasm during announcements.  He said, "You know, we do this 51 weeks a year."  Ha!  I thought it was funny.  I tried to take photos of the kids and Ruby was great with saying "cheese" but Ian was refusing to be photographed.  And with in minutes he was in his VT jersey and shorts that are UVA colors (navy and orange).  He was showing his Virginia pride.  Oh well, at least I got a couple photos to document that he was dressed nicely, even if he looked ticked off.  Ian and Ruby went out to buy Mommy and Mom Mom Easter flowers.  I got beautiful purple tulips from Chris and Mom Mom!  I love them.  Mom Mom and Pop Pop arrived and we had an Easter egg hunt in the front yard.  Then we enjoyed the lunch.  Pop Pop cracked Chris and I up with his love for the ham.  He couldn't get enough of it.  It was very tasty!  I just got lucky and picked up a good ham at Ukrops.  There was nothing else to choose from since our Ukrops was closing for good the next day, it was this ham or nothing.  So I bought it.  Turns out, it was fabulous and really made Pop Pop happy!  We then dyed eggs on the back deck and had more Easter egg hunts.  My kids love to hunt for eggs!  We then enjoyed our dessert of angel food cake, strawberries and whip cream.  Yum!

We said goodbye to Mom Mom and Pop Pop.  Pop Pop starts chemotherapy and radiation tomorrow.  We're so glad that they made the trip to spend the day with us.  Please keep him in your prayers! 

I was thinking alot about Roger and Rachel Reynolds today.  I read their blog and it appears that they planted Charlotte's ashes with a butterfly bush today.  What a great way to spend the day!  Regardless, their loss of sweet Charlotte is a constant reminder that "every day is a bonus" with your kids.   

My parents and Meg's family are in NYC right now.  I'm envious, I'm sure they are having a wonderful time. 

Chris's shift is changing this week.  He is back on evening shift which presents new changes and challenges.  But we'll make it work after a week or two of transition.  And of course we've got Disney World to prepare for.  Lots of packing to be done when the kids are finally down for bed at night.  We're getting really excited about our trip and are pleased that Mom Mom is still planning to go with us. 

Ian's QOTD (at bedtime).  "Mommy can I get a puppy that sleeps as much as Molly?  I'd like an old puppy.  Can we go to the pet store tomorrow?"  I then went on to explain that puppies cannot be "old" because they are new dogs.  That came outta nowhere!

Hoppy Easter!

I'm Back!

I have not written on the blog in a while.  So, I'm back. 

We just had a great weekend!  I FINISHED the Monument Avenue 10k with my twin sister by my side!  I got emotional during the walk when I got half way (3.1 miles) and as we got close to the finish line.  I thought about how I felt this time last year.  I remember my days were full of muscle spasms that would leave my left arm stuck until the spasm ended.  And I was having about 50 spasms a day (when I was able to actually keep count).  I was just going through the motions to get through the day and for my children at home and at work.  So, Meg and I walked most of the way but had some short jogging moments.  Overall, we finished it in 1.5 hours.  I can't remember the last time I exercised for an hour and 1/2 straight.  I guess it would be the last time I did the 10k, before Ian was born, so 5 years ago.   It was chilly at the start but it turned out to be a perfect day for the race.  I loved seeing Rachel and Meredith at the CJSTUF cheering section.  And then I saw Chris, Ian, and Ruby in the median watching me.  That was really special!  So, I'm feeling really accomplished.  My only complaint is the large blister on the ball of my foot.  But I was able to walk to the playground w/ Ruby yesterday afternoon.  And today we walked all around Maymont, so I'm really doing great!   Thank the Lord!  And thanks to all of my friends and family who donated to CJSTUF!

We chose to skip church this morning and go to Maymont.  We enjoyed the morning.  The children loved the animals.  Ruby would say, "Bye pig", "Bye Goat", "Bye Sheep" "Bye Horsey Nay".  She loved the animals and following her big brother around.  Ian was so cute.  He wanted to pick the daffodils and "pick one for Mommy".  He's such a dear little boy.  We tried to explain that they are not ours to pick.  I gently suggested that he and Daddy could buy Mommy flowers for Easter.  I thought that was a good idea!  Ian said something cute as we hiked up the big hill back to the car.  He started to slow down and he said, "Daddy, I'm all out of energy!"  He makes me laugh.  

This afternoon was spent with playing outside and errands.  Later, I went to help stuff eggs for the neighborhood Easter egg hunt.  I struggled to keep from eating all that candy. 

So, over the weeks we've been busy...  I had all 3 of the Helsleys over for a sleepover on 3/12/10 so that Erik and Meg could go to see Wicked.  Chris was with me until he had to head to work at 10pm.  Overall the kids did great and enjoyed their time together.  Ian's behavior was the most challenging and he was mainly tired and excited to have his cousins over for a sleepover.  Landen had a cute quote after watching Shrek II.  He said, "I'm going to go home and look in my big book of fairy tales because the story of Shrek is in there."  He then said, "In Shrek II they said, this is the best fairy tale of all time!"  So cute.  I didn't dash his hopes.  Cohen was cute when he was playing w/ 2 cars and named one car Emily and the other car, Chris.  Kate was so sweet and affectionate to Ruby.  She introduced Ruby to blueberries in yogurt.  Now Ruby always requests "berries" in her yogurt. 

Cohen turned 2 on March 21st.  Shocking!!  Here's a photo of the precious little boy.  He's wearing a shirt that was Ian's and it's one of my favorites.  I love seeing Ian's clothes on Drew and Cohen.  Mom and Dad were here for a week around Cohen's birthday so they helped with childcare and cooking meals.  And Amanda, Chris C., and Drew came for the birthday party.  It was great to see them.  Drew is so cute!  

Pop Pop (Allen Jr., Chris's dad), saw the oncologist and they have a plan for treating his lung cancer.  He starts radiation and chemotherapy on 4/5/10.  I think he and Mom Mom are pleased to have a plan.  Please keep them in your prayers.  Mom Mom still hopes to go to Orlando with us if Pop Pop is doing okay. 

I need to start preparing for the Orlando trip.  We're now flying instead of driving so that adds a different level of preparation.  But, hopefully it will be low stress and we'll be happy we flew.  :)  We're looking forward to Disney World!  I've tried to read and look at info. but I feel so overwhelmed by it all.  But, I figure if I can navigate through NYC, I can handle Disney World and the Orlando Area. 

I've got to get ready for the week... 
 

A Good Weekend

Chris and I took the kids to Casa Grande on Friday night.  We had a nice dinner.  I keep being pleasantly surprised by the smoking ban in restaurants.  They seated us on the side of Casa Grande that used to be the "smoking section".  I almost stopped the receptionist to let him know that we needed a non-smoking table.  But, then I remembered the new law.  Thanks Tim Kaine! 

I went to Wine Night after the kids were in bed on Friday night.  It was fun to see my neighborhood friends.  Unfortunately, I couldn't stay long so I could get back for Chris to go to work.  But, I still had a nice time catching up.  Wine Night has been great especially in these winter months when we don't get to chat at the playground.  Plus Wine Night lets us actually complete a sentence without "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy" being yelled by our kids. 

On Saturday we went to Cracker Barrel and then headed to the Northern Neck to see Mom Mom and Pop Pop.  Chris was tired but he was a trooper after being up all night.  We had a nice time.  I was pleased to see that Pop Pop looked really good!  He seemed to have a good attitude, great coloring, and appeared comfortable.  I noticed that he fell asleep more during the day but that may be the addition of a couple new medicines.  Plus, he's still catching up on the sleep he lost in the hospital.  It was a nice sunny day so Mom Mom and I took Ian and Ruby to the playground at the daycare where she works occasionally.  They really enjoyed the playground and it let them get their wiggles out.  Pop Pop and Daddy were able to take naps when we left.  When we returned Ian, Ruby, Mom Mom, and I made 2 pizzas.  After the pizza, we celebrated Allen's birthday (on Monday) with an angel food cake, strawberries, and chocolate ice cream. 

We headed home after dessert.  We put the kids in their pajamas and hit the road.  They were both asleep by the time we hit the main road.  It was so quiet and it allowed Chris and I to talk and listen to "adult music" (The Dixie Chicks). 

Ian did something funny and cute at Mom Mom and Pop Pop's house.  Mom Mom has a ceramic rabbit in her living room.  It is hollow inside.  He picked it up and said, "Oh, it's a bunny shell".  He put it to his ear and said, "I'm listening for the ocean."  He was completely serious.  It was very cute and clever.   

We've enjoyed our day today.  I took Kate and Ruby to church and Chris took Ian the Church of AMF (bowling).  Then Kathy, Meg, and I took a nice long walk in the sun and wind.  We are all preparing for the Monument Ave. 10k.  Then Chris and I watched the Olympics while the kids napped.  After their naps we took a walk/bike ride to the playground.  It was fun but chilly.  Ruby is so cute when she gets outside.  She was so giddy at the playground today, just giggling and screaming.  She loves it!

We watched the big hockey game between Canada and U.S.A. but were sad by the end.  I'm not a big fan of hockey, mainly because I can't keep up with the puck.  But, Chris thought it was a good game although he was sad by the loss in OT.  I've enjoyed the Winter Olympics. 

Happy Birthday to Donnie and Anna!

Happy Birthday tomorrow to Amanda and Pop Pop!

Yeah March!  I'm ready for Spring.

On to Monday...